"You come off a little arrogant, Lisa."
I was shocked.
I felt like such an imposter. How could I be arrogant?
It was my first lead role at a customer service call center. I was so flattered by the role - it meant I was a leader! And I regularly worried I was over my head.
I got defensive. She must not know what she's talking about. I dismissed the feedback. (Talk about arrogance!)
If you wrestle with self-doubt, take note. You may be coming off as arrogant too.
Here's the dynamic: I felt insecure in the role. Instead of turning inward to reinforce my own value and reassure myself, I compared myself to others. I needed to feel "better than" them and resisted ever being wrong.
Arrogance is the protective armor of someone who's afraid of being found out as a fraud. Arrogance cannot tolerate being wrong because that may shatter the illusion of superiority.
Instant confidence may not be available to you, but here's what is: courage.
The courage to be wrong, not meet someone's expectations, disappoint someone or get critical feedback.
When you have your own back you put down your defenses.
You are resilient.
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